Redefining

What’s Going On!?

My life has changed too significantly in the past year to leave this blog the way it has been.  God has consistently challenged me and caused me to grow in my faith, and there is so much more I’d like to share.  I’m now in the middle of life before the middle of my life.  It’s meant to be ambiguous, but you know, it’s where a person is an adult, and just barely has a grasp on what that means.  Where many things make sense, but there is so much room for change.  I like the word quarterlife, but it’s not my word and it has too much associated with it.  Still, some speculate about a quarterlife crisis many in my generation experience.  Maybe that’s why there has been so much change, or maybe, I’m just now starting to understand who I really am or who God want’s me to be.

Sometimes, everything just makes sense, and I know exactly what I want to be involved with.  Most of the time, I’m realizing, I pursue too much.  There’s something about being passionate about having an effect on the world that causes stress.  Who would have guessed?

In this stage of life, I’ve recognized personally that I’ve started to want to make a difference concerning the issues that are closest to my heart.  My worldview is formed and solid.  It’s been challenged so many times before and by God’s grace the core of what I believe has stood firm.  I’m not claiming I have it all together.  I’m just very comfortable with what I believe, and I love talking to anyone about it.

I love this song; it explains exactly how I feel:
“Honesty is a hard attribute to find, when we all want to seem like, we’ve got it all figured out.  Well let me be the first to say that I don’t have a clue.  I don’t have all the answers; ain’t gonna’ pretend like I do.”  – Trying by Lifehouse.

Attitude

Apparently, I’ve become an extrovert.  I was shocked and amazed to find that the once shy daydreamer I was has become the exact opposite.  I find myself asking, is it possible to be both introverted and excited about one’s faith?  One thing is sure, I did not intentionally attempt to change myself.  I was changed by that which I believe in.

Work

This change in direction in my life has both caused, and has been helped by, a change in focus at work.  I started as an applications developer, but grasped the “bigger picture” over the last two years.  There were so many ideas I had, but it was hardly appropriate to act on them.  Since, I’ve distanced myself from programming, for better or worse, and have started managing.  I’m extremely fortunate, thoroughly enjoy my job, and wouldn’t trade this opportunity for any other work experience right now.

Some of the change at work is spilling over into this blog.  Everyone who reads it had to have noticed that the theme changed.  Some probably also noticed the domain name changed too.  I’ve made the switch completely now to WordPress.com from my own site, and while I can’t play with the code anymore and customize to my heart’s content; this is so much easier to manage.

Pride

Redefining my life in this way has created new challenges.  I’ve found new temptations around every decision, every corner.  Feeling more comfortable socially isn’t an easy change and it doesn’t reduce the responsibility to keep control over words said.  Too often, I’m convicted that I’ve unintentionally thought too highly of myself or too less of others.  Pride is such a slippery, shape shifting sin.  Even if it lives in the sub-conscious, it still manages to find its way into my life.  May God grant me grace and those I interact with patience.

This Blog

I expect I’ll still write, as available, about my faith, but there’s so much more I’d like to share in this blog.  This is why I’ve moved and changed the title.  I need the freedom to write about everything that I’d like to share; that’s really what blogging is all about, right?  With that, I look forward to everything ahead.

Philippians 1:6 is my prayer as these changes occur in my life.

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Published in: on May 17, 2008 at 11:24 am  Comments (1)